Customer Service

Customer service in India is truly abominable. The funnynotfunny saying here is that if you want to get anything done, you have to go in person...and make a fuss. 

For example, there was that time I called the four star hotel where I was slated to attend a conference the next day in an attempt to find out what time the conference started. I got transferred around to five different people before ending up with a fellow who, in broken English, tried to figure out when I was scheduling my conference for, and how many attendees there would be before I hung up in frustration. I asked my office manager, who speaks Hindi, to call back and explain I was just looking to figure out what time the conference started. My office manager dutifully called and reported back: "They say there is no conference at the hotel tomorrow." (LIES! I was there at 9am sharp, just to be sure, and found myself an hour early.)

Then there was that time that I called my phone service carrier's help line to figure out what documents I needed to send in to ensure my service wasn't cut off after three  months (which apparently happens to foreigners' phones). I was reassured by two different people that my phone was fine ("Why are you calling ma'am, if there is currently no problem with your service?) before the third operator suggested I try stopping in my local airtel store instead. FYI, my phone was not fine--I had to resubmit all of my visa paperwork.

Then there was this, my favorite:

Kate to computer store guy: Hi, the powercord for my Lenovo X789 computer is fritzed. I need to buy a new one. Can you please let me know if you carry this in stock?

Computer store guy: Come in, and we'll look.

Kate: Can you look now so I don't have to come all the way in if you don't have it?

Computer store guy: Just come in and we'll look together.

Kate: I'd really prefer if you just checked quickly now. I can call back in a few minutes.

Computer store guy (without skipping a beat): OK, OK, we have it.

Kate: Wait, you didn't take any time to look. How do you know you have it?

Computer store guy: We'll find it when you come in.

The above tales of woe are all about phone customer service, but the truth is that customer service generally here is totally sucky. You often have to press to get a person to do anything remotely helpful which is not explicitly in their job description.

Now, Delhi is a  cosmopolitan city with loads of people (both foreigners and local) who would appreciate good service--I know there is a market here for services that are customer-focused. So, the fact that this doesn't exist is matter of wonder amongst my friends and a usual topic of conversation. Here are some of the more credible theories of why India, a country with the sophistication and cheap labor force to deliver grade A customer service, tends to fail so dismally:

1. There is no popular public feedback mechanism (like Yelp) for most services. So, if you have a terrible experience with a company no one other than your immediate circle will be dissuaded to use that company. There is thus no incentive for a company to be better.

2. Indians, having been socialized in an environment where bargaining is the norm and where crappy customer service is the norm, would generally prefer to pay less for a service which is not customer-focused than to pay more for a customer-focused service so, actually, there really isn't a market. 

3. Despite the oversupply of labor here, Indians who are educated to be managers are in short supply; rather the labor excess consists of unskilled laborers. Plus, promotions and hiring within companies here tend to be based on whose nephew you are instead of performance, so there aren't that many well-run services to begin with.

4. We're all just being pranked, all of the time.

5. Time warner is slowly taking over the world.

Anyone else have ideas, thoughts or speculations on this?