Arriving on Indian soil about three weeks ago, I have to
admit I knew very little about the country. I had promised myself that I
would read books on Indian history and culture, prior to arrival, but
of course in the madcap two weeks between leaving my law firm and
arriving in Delhi there was packing to do, flights and hotels to book,
parents to calm down, friends to see, parties to plan and all sorts of
other procrastinatory events which munched at my time. And so I stepped
off the plane at Indira Ghandi International Airport with my entire
knowledge of India stemming largely from three sources: Bollywood
movies, the book "Behind the Beautiful Forevers", and my own backpacking adventure through India in 2010.
Here are the top five lessons I learned from each:
Form Bollywood movies, I have learned the following:
1. All spunky young Indians have generational conflict with their parents. For men, this usually revolves around their desire to become artists instead of businessmen. For women this usually revolves around wanting to date said artist.
2. Song and choreographed dance is liable to break out at any moment. (I assume that, much like young Chinese children, all Indians are taught the choreographed routines in elementary school.)
4. All Indian women are gorgeous, with milky-white skin. (See below, for example of gorgeous Indian woman, with milky-white skin and using her personal wind machine).
Here are the top five lessons I learned from each:
Form Bollywood movies, I have learned the following:
1. All spunky young Indians have generational conflict with their parents. For men, this usually revolves around their desire to become artists instead of businessmen. For women this usually revolves around wanting to date said artist.
2. Song and choreographed dance is liable to break out at any moment. (I assume that, much like young Chinese children, all Indians are taught the choreographed routines in elementary school.)
3. All Indian women carry around personal wind-machines, which may come in handy when aforementioned song and choreographed dance occur. Or, really, at any time.
4. All Indian women are gorgeous, with milky-white skin. (See below, for example of gorgeous Indian woman, with milky-white skin and using her personal wind machine).
5. All caucasian women are sluts.
From Behind the Beautiful Forevers (written by the incredible Katherine Boo), I have learned the following:
1. India is a country of incredible, heartbreaking poverty.
2. Slumdwellers are remarkably industrious, ingenious and focused on social mobility.
3. Corruption is pervasive and opportunity is limited--so much so that at times corruption can be the only opportunity.
4. You don't want to go near the legal system.
4. You don't want to go near the legal system.
5. You definitely don't want to go to jail.
From my own travels through India I have learned the following:
1. When a village elder offers you a liquid refreshment you shouldn't drink it because it could be opium. (See village elder below, who is about to offer me opium)
2. Especially outside of the cities, I am an famous Indian celebrity who all Indian men want to take their picture with.
3. Wealthy Indians are like, super wealthy.
4. Always check street food for cockroaches, first.
5. India is colorful, chaotic, enthralling, crazy, vibrant, dusty, demanding, delicious and utterly mesmerizing.
So
there you have it, folks. Everything I knew about India when I arrived.
I can't wait to see what new lessons the coming months hold for me!
I'm excited to follow your travels! I can't promise I'll comment all the time, but I'll try to get some good ones in. Looking forward to lots of pictures so I can live vicariously. :)
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